Continuing a proud tradition in sleazy tabloid news that nobody wants to hear about shockingly uninspired movies that almost no one will watch, the Sun reports that Sylvester Stallone forsook all kinds of nookie, hanky panky and tomfoolery in order to get into character for his reprisal of the role of Rocky Balboa in Rocky VI. In the world according to Sly, getting into a murderous rage requires one to be deprived of sex in any form. Unless he got so hard up that he started giving come-hither looks to his sparring partners, I'm assuming this approach works.
Apart from providing an outlet for sexually frustrated people all around the world (losers) to get their teeth knocked loose and/or receive debilitating injuries, Stallone has also created the perfect excuse to explain especially long dry spells in our sex lives. If you ever feel awkward when the subject of sex comes up with your buddies, you can now claim to be in training to be a pro-boxer. Annoying follow-up questions about your exercise regimen can always be avoided by biting a chunk off the asker's ear. Nothing like uncontrollable bleeding to bring a conversation to a standstill.
If Stallone is right in making this connection between violence and sex, then he's also given us the answer to world peace. Which is a full-blown orgy between all the nations of the world! Now all we need is a very large mattress, some Marvin Gaye and 6.5 billion condoms.
4 comments:
IN that case, I think I know a lot of people whose going to be the next Rocky.
Ahhhh you speak the truth me boy, luv the way u brought out the facts in that.
Hmmm, universal orgy...specially between the heads of states (imagine the UN general assemly in an orgy), mutha....lol.
Keep it going.
http://www.globalorgasm.org/
Not for peace, but for changing energy field of the Earth.
MAKE LURRVE NOT WAR......LETS GET IT ON
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